“My simple notes”: Patterns of self-identity in the diary of Nina Lashina

Abstract

This article analyses the diary of Nina Lashina (1906–1990), which was published in 2011. This work could be termed a diary of “everyday life” or a “diary of an ordinary woman”. When analyzing this text, the author presupposes that a diary narrative is a space where an ongoing process of self-identifcation is taking place. However, this narrative always involves leitmotif models and biographical schemes that are essential for the author of the diary, and self-description and self-representation are carried out within this framework. The article demonstrates that the key concepts in Lashina's diary are those of “ordinary life” and “women's everyday life”, and a central legitimizing metanarrative is the history of a mother's self-sacrifce. We interpret deliberate marginalizing of one's own Self through the concept of “ordinariness” as one of the tactics of “wandering out”, according Michel de Certeau's terminology. These tactics manage to redefne the institutional efforts implemented by the Power. At the same time, Lashina's diary demonstrates her deep dependence on dominant notions of the woman's role — self-sacrifcing mother and responsible wife, one who constantly controls the life of her husband and family. Such matriarchal practices are depicted by the author of the diary as inevitable and necessary for survival. On the other hand, the idea of “heroic life” and the hagiographical model of biographical narrative are used in this text not to describe civic virtues or or a religious spiritual exploit, but rather to represent the everyday female existence engaged in ceaseless efforts to overcome chaos, the entropy of everyday life.